Book Recommendation: Parenting Beyond Your Capacity

A few years ago my pastor introduced me to a book, and the title grabbed my attention immediately: Parenting Beyond Your Capacity by Reggie Joiner and Carey Nieuwhof. 

As parents, we feel overloaded and maxed out. How do we parent beyond our capacity?

The authors provide five principles:

1. Widen the Circle – Pursue strategic relationships for your kids.

2. Imagine the End – Focus your priorities on what matters most.

3. Fight for the Heart – Communicate in a style that gives the relationship value.

4. Create Rhythm – Increase the quantity of quality time you spend together.

5. Make it Personal – Put yourself first when it comes to personal growth.

I highly recommend this practical and biblically solid book. May the Holy Spirit work in us and through us as we seek to parent beyond our capacity!

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Failure

Recently I heard a mom of three children say, “I want my children to experience failure before they grow up and leave my house and are out on their own. I want to help them work through the failure, learn from the failure, and overcome the challenges of the failure.”

Her statement got my attention. There is a side of me that does not want to see my children fail or experience hardships. But, I do want them to learn to be resilient, to learn to depend on God for help, and to learn to persevere.

James 1:2-4 states, “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”

Trials, hardships, and failures are classrooms for learning patience, humility, and steadfastness. Through them God can increase our faith in Him and grow our dependence on Him. 

We all want the promise at the end of this passage: “perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” Okay, this may not happen until heaven, but none the less trials can get us closer to these targets.

I do not pray for failure for my children or myself, but I do pray for genuine faith, true humility, and godly grit and resilience. I do not know how God will accomplish this, and I realize the clearest lessons in life often come through moments of failure. Amazingly, God works mistakes, hardships, and trials for the good of Christians. He brings victory from failure.

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Intimate and Awesome Prayer

I'm reading the book Life, God and Other Small Topics: Conversations from Socrates in the City, edited by Eric Metaxas. One chapter is a lecture given by N.T. Wright in 2006.

One of Wrights statements caught my attention,

“If you read chapters 13 through 17 of John’s gospel, you’ll discover a wonderful model of Christian prayer. Prayer is supposed to be simultaneously intimate and awesome. That’s an odd combination to us, but actually that’s how it is. There is an awe in the presence of one’s Creator, but there is also an intimacy because the Creator invites us to call him Father.”

I like this description of prayer as being both intimate and awesome.

Do you stand in awe of God? Do you know his power and might? Do you have a healthy fear of him? Do you worship him?

Do you also have an intimate relationship with him? Do you know his love? Do you know his care? Do you know him as your Father?

Because of Jesus’ sacrifice, Christians can approach God the Father with confidence. We can talk to him, and he hears us. We have an amazing God!

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Life's Paradoxes

Charles Colson was a Christian leader who founded Prison Fellowship, had a daily radio program, wrote many books, and started the Colson Center for Christian Worldview. He was also Special Counsel to President Nixon, where his actions led to him serving time in jail. Amazingly, God used the lowest of lows in his life to save him and completely change him. You can read the full story in his autobiography Born Again. I highly recommend it.

I am reading the book Life, God and Other Small Topics: Conversations from Socrates in the City, edited by Eric Metaxas. One chapter is a lecture given by Charles Colson in 2006. One of Colson’s statements jumped out at me,

“One of the things about my life—those of you who know much of my story will know it has been a roller coaster certainly, but one of the things that I think my life illustrates is what a paradox life is. It’s never the way we think it’s going to be, and sometimes the worst things we do turn out to be the best things, while the things we think are the best sometimes turn out to be the worst.” (p 170)

I completely agree. Life is full of paradoxes. Some of the greatest challenges I have faced have led to significant growth in my faith and character. Trials have made me stronger. Physical ailments have humbled me and made me more dependent on God and others. Hard times have prompted me to pray more and read the Word more.

It all reminds me that God is in control. He uses trials to refines us. For Christians, He works all for our good.

Are you going through a challenging time now? Do your circumstances discourage you? Remember your Heavenly Father loves you and holds you. He will make you strong for the task at hand. He will grow your faith. He will work this for you good.

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God’s Voice

What is God’s will for your life? How do you hear His direction? How do you discern His voice?

In chapter 12 of Chase The Lion, Mark Batterson states,

How do you discern the voice of God? It starts with the Word of God. If you want to get a word from God, get into the Word of God. That’s how you learn to discern the voice of God. After all, it’s the Spirit of God who inspired the Word of God. And when the Spirit of God quickens the Word of God, it’s like hearing the voice of God in Dolby surround sound.

Christians want to do God’s will. We want to hear His voice, follow His lead, and accomplish His goals. The challenge is hearing His voice.

Mark Batterson reminds us that this should start with getting into the Word of God. Daily Bible reading places God’s words right in front of us. Studying Scripture helps us discern His voice.

The Word of God is alive and active. Scripture is God-breathed. We have the opportunity every day to read the Holy Word of God.

Hebrews 4:12, “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”

II Timothy 3:16-17, “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.”

Read one chapter from the Old Testament and one chapter from the New Testament every day. Read carefully, meditate on the Word, and anticipate hearing God's voice.

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Before & After Age 30

I am reading Mark Batterson’s book Chase The Lion. Batterson leads National Community Church in Washington, DC and has written many inspiring books. In Chase The Lion, Batterson seeks to inspire us to pursue big goals for our big God. The book’s subtitle is, “If your dream doesn’t scare you, it’s too small.”

On page 48, Batterson tells the story of Albert Schwitzer: “It was a summer morning in 1896 when Albert made a resolution. ‘While outside the birds sang…I came to the conclusion that until I was thirty I could consider myself justified in devoting myself to scholarship and the arts,’ Schweitzer said, ‘but after that I would devote myself directly to serving humanity.’”

What a fascinating and inspiring resolution! Schwitzer had a heart to serve the Lord and serve others. He also realized he had knowledge to gain, skills to learn, and gifts to develop. He saw the first 30 years of his life as the season to sow into himself and prepare for the future calling God had for him. But, he was also determined to not live a life focused on himself. After 30 he was determined to serve humanity—to serve others.

There is a time for everything—a time to learn, a time to train, a time to prepare yourself. There is also a time to act, a time to serve, a time to bless others.

What season are you in? How are you making the most of today? How are you devoting yourself to growth? How are you serving humanity?

I highly recommend Mark Batterson’s book to you. You will be inspired and encouraged.

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Follow Me (Matthew 4:19-22)

After Jesus was tempted in the wilderness, he began his public ministry. In Matthew 4:19-22, he calls his first disciples. To Peter and Andrew he said, “‘Come, follow me…and I will make you fishers of men.’ At once they left their nets and followed him.”

He made the same call to James and John, and “immediately they left the boat and their father and followed him.”

Isn’t it amazing that Jesus calls out to us and beckons us to follow him? He loves us, desires a relationship with us, and asks us to follow him.

The four disciples teach us a valuable lesson through their examples. They heard and responded. They immediately dropped what they were doing and followed him. They stopped their labor, changed their priorities, and focused on Jesus as their teacher, leader, and rabbi. And they were never the same again!

Has Jesus called you to follow him? The main focus of a Christian is Christ, and our main job is to surrender and follow Jesus. We surrender our will to his, our goals to his, and our desires to his. We stop leading ourselves and instead surrender and follow him.

This isn’t easy, and it isn’t our natural instinct. This requires us to humbly say Jesus is better, his ways are better, and his path is best. This requires us to trust that Christ is worth much more than anything we would give up to follow him.

Choose today to surrender your heart to Jesus Christ. Submit your every thought, word, and action to him. Drop everything and follow him.

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